That famous Burbank neighborly-ness

Referred to us via the **WeLoveBurbank!** Facebook site:



Charming. Apparently they’re upset about people parking in front of their house on a public street.

(Don’t tell them that hosing down a car in the street like that breaks at least two different laws in Burbank…)

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Where’s Sanity?


Imagine taking away a two-way street for this kind of crap.



Where’s there to bike to around there btw? And why is it always White People in those fancy drawings?

Our bet is that this moronic bike path will last about two years before it’s “repurposed” back into a real street. Gordon’s right, too. Until then there’ll be lots of sideswiping on that soon-too-narrow street.

Not one council member agreed with his perfectly sensible observation:

Councilman David Gordon voted against the improvements, saying he had concerns about the slimmer-than-usual parking lane, and he feared that people getting out of their vehicles may be struck by oncoming traffic.

Additionally, Gordon said he did not like the idea of having bicyclists and pedestrians using the same lane. He suggested having a curb instead of bike lanes.

“We have 10 feet of travel lanes against 8 feet of parking in a lot of places,” Kriske said. “This is not out of the ordinary for Burbank. It has the wonderful side effect, we think, that cars won’t be able to go fast because [the lane] will be tight and [they’ll travel] slower.”

Yeah, uh-huh. That’s how drivers work.




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We won! City’s finally forced to treat SDUs the way we always said they should


Talk about an exercise in futility. Staff tomorrow night is asking the council members to adopt an “interim ordinance” that’s apparently designed to stall for as long as possible the effects of a new state law that vastly liberalizes the use and construction of second dwelling units in Burbank.

Given the interest in building ADUs and the ability for the city to further specify certain aspects of new state law, staff proposes City Council consideration of the proposed urgency ordinance as an interim measure so that the city can properly evaluate the state ADU regulations. The proposed urgency ordinance adoption and immediate implementation will allow staff to formulate a long term set of city development regulations that facilitate the construction of new ADUs as alternative housing types in a manner that helps mitigate the potential impact to the residential character of the surrounding neighborhood, and provides staff with a set of development standards that can be applied consistently to new ADU project submittals.

Hilariously, this request was preceded by a three-page list of current BMC rules about second dwelling units that are now abolished by the new state law. In other words, California now requires local communities to encourage the use of granny flats as necessary housing stock, and not do what Burbank did 15 years ago and throw up as many roadblocks as it could to make it essentially impossible to have them anywhere. So there’s nothing staff can do now to avoid the unavoidable.

We’ve always been big fans of granny flats, and remember a time in Burbank when they were all over the place. SDUs can often provide good quality housing in lieu of our town’s generally cheesy and overpriced apartment stock, and with the side benefit of extra family income for the homeowner.

Unfortunately, the City of Burbank and most of our council people (and their many landlord friends) have not been. So watch them go into major wailing-and-lamentation mode tomorrow night when they have to begrudgingly go along with these new state rules.

Too frigging bad.


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The biggest one of all


Birthday. Almost forgot.



Where did he get those words?
In stereophonic sound:


Here’s another one from yesterday. Genius hand in hand.


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Ask council and staff when the last time was that they used public transportation



Oh boy. Somehow this is going to be politically transmuted into a No.1 Grade A excuse to build more apartment buildings near our “transportation centers…”

21st-century accessible, of course.

Burbank and its neighbors are teaming up to potentially get their hands on $1 billion in transportation funding

Burbank, along with a few neighboring cities, is looking to make sure it receives money collected by a new Los Angeles County sales tax that can be used for transportation improvements.

Burbank City Council members unanimously agreed to convert the Arroyo Verdugo Subregion — an informal group that was created to allow Burbank, Glendale, La Cañada Flintridge, Pasadena and South Pasadena to discuss transportation-related issues in the region — into a joint powers authority during a meeting on Tuesday.

Transportation issues is code for more transportation projects, and “transportation projects” is going to be used as beaucoup pretext for allowing outside developers to mega-build huge apartment complexes on select local properties.

It’s already happening. Change is good people. Didn’t you know that? Mixed use and NYC style getting around is your mandated future.

But, the next time you hear Burbank people go on and on about how great public transportation is — and especially about how we ought to do everything we can to amalgamate it into Burbank 2035 — be sure to ask each of them individually when the last time was that they took the bus anywhere.

Except possibly for various SCAG meetings and other similar staff excursions via secret use of Burbank Transit Services vehicles (and then lied about when caught by witnesses), the answer will be “never.”


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Miracle on 34th Street

Kind of. It was actually the first American theatrical showing for money.





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The Columbia University station is doing a 24-hour celebration today.

They just played an obscure Gene Krupa number from 1941 featuring Graham Young on trumpet. Yeah, the same Mr. Young from Muir.




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Parents, be sure to set a good example for the kids


Pot, kettle, that kind of thing.

It’s going to be fun to watch the Piety Patrol go to pieces.


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They just look like relocatables



Remember when Burbank voters were told that one of the big plans behind the last three expensive bond issues was to replace aging bungalows with actual permanent buildings?

Instead, you’ve gotten crap.

Burbank Unified officials broke ground for two new modular classroom buildings at Robert Louis Stevenson Elementary School on Monday, April 17.

The new buildings replace the aging, existing portable classrooms with more modern facilities and is funded by the Burbank voter-approved Measure S Bond.

“It will be nice to get our teachers and students out of the bungalows and into permanent classrooms,” said Principal Christina Desiderio…

Ralph Waldo Emerson, Theodore Roosevelt and George Washington Elementary Schools were the first sites that received the new permanent modular classroom buildings. Emerson has four new modular classrooms, Roosevelt has six new classrooms and new restrooms and Washington has eight new classrooms and new restrooms.

These aren’t true permanent buildings, and it’s not what we were told years ago this money would be used for.

Another thing. Are these union employees who build this junk?

No? If not, why not?

This coming from the same crowd that lied through their teeth about why they got rid of most of the district’s Log Cabins a few years ago (it was some ridiculous story about an unavailability of “replacement parts”).

Log Cabins which by the way were not built as cheap WPA projects. They were contracted for well into the 1920s.  Lincoln’s bid notice showed up in an old issue of Southwest Builder and Contractor somewhere around 1920.



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The holier-than-thou crowd chimes in again

The most hilarious headline of the year so far:


Cable News, Hollywood Reacts to Bill O’Reilly’s Fox Exit


Their opinions mean so much because we know that there’s no hint of sexism or sexual misconduct in either of those two businesses.

Hollywood: the bastion of sexual self-restraint and good behavior. And who in their right mind would actually feel sympathetic to any woman who wants to work at FOX News?

As one of our left-wing female friends put it last week, “Serves them right.”


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Watch that spigot open wide



It’s no coincidence that there’s been a complete absence of any kind of big development or building projects in front of the council the last six months or so.

Or even longer than that. No bad news of course means nothing to get upset about during the election season.

Watch them suddenly show up.


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The Springer crowd has no idea why she won. It’s actually because in most political eras in Burbank you can only run one dissident candidate at a time



They can flatter themselves all they want to about brilliance and “progressivism,” but this Springer crowd really has no idea in the world why she won last week’s council race.

This is taken directly from a comment we made earlier today. If you’re too bored to read it through entirely, here’s the upshot. Unless things are really bad in Burbank — like immediately grave and destructive, where people are almost rioting in the streets about a problem — you can’t run more than one dissident candidate at a time. It’s historically true.

We’ll explain:

In the primary, the Establishment “We hate those ugly council critics!” supporters had three viable candidates to chose from: Talamantes, Frutos, and Springer.

After Talamantes hit 50 percent, their votes were split off to only two candidates in the runoff: Frutos and Springer. That means Talamantes’ spillover added to their totals. With two votes per ballot — split between two and not three candidates now– they both got them all. The result was a natural statistical increase for the remaining “booster” candidates.

Gordon didn’t have the same advantage. Any spillover he could get in the runoff would only have come from marginal and much lesser known candidates. At best, there weren’t enough of those votes available. Unfortunately, Burbank has a relatively static voter pool to draw upon. That’s part of the bigger problem.

None of this is brain surgery to figure out, and none of it involved a “brilliant campaign.” If there had been another popular or known “booster” candidate (or even a popular “semi” booster) in the runoff in PLACE OF GUILLEN then Gordon would have been a shoo-in to win. The two votes of each booster anti-critic resident would have then been split three ways, not two.

If you look at past Gordon victories, that’s exactly how they occurred. Unfortunately for Burbank and the way this younger and more credulous electorate always pans out now (and not as it did 25 years ago), there’s only room for one dissident candidate at a time.

Here’s an example — it was Gordon’s first victory. The “establishment” votes were split between several other candidates and Gordon slipped in:

Just wait though– when we have a reprise of the horrible late 80s and early 90s “growth” years.

Then dissidents will run freely. And win again in majorities, like the fervent mid-90s. But until things get worse it’s just one anti-establishment candidate at a time. That’s Burbank.



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Of course




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Why would you want to be mayor of this joint?


The future mayor made a couple of perfectly sensible comments recently about Donald Trump’s missing 1040s on that **WeLoveBurbank** Facebook page, and look what happened:



Besides learning how to do paragraph breaks, Will should have mentioned that the real problem with Trump refusing to divulge his complete filings over the years is that we have no idea where he’s been getting all his money. No one cares about his taxes, just how many Russian oligarchs he’s doing business with. That of course is why he’s hiding them.

The response was predictable. From a crowd that wouldn’t be able to spell “Occidental College” if their life depended upon it:



Is Eric saying that Obama should have released his college transcripts? Probably not, but that’s what happens when you get sucked into conversations with idiots.



Yeah, Trump’s taxes are Ok to hide, but that Hawaiian guy obviously didn’t have the smarts to do a lateral transfer into Columbia College. So he’s hiding his grades! Or maybe all those Marxism classes they have.

Btw Eric: there’s no one there to respect. Presidents who are White don’t get their transcripts demanded of them, nor are they accused of being non-citizens.

The Burbank electorate obviously did David G. a favor last week by getting him out of the place the way they did. If we were in his shoes we’d immediately sell the house and eyeglass business and flee to Temecula or Portland or wherever it is old Burbankers go.


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When you start making $100,000 a year you have no clue what it takes


To get by, that is. And unless you have great strength of character, you don’t care.




Rogers’ wife was also making well over 100Gs a year in her public/private job, and his late mother married into money years ago on her own. He’s hardly Mr. Warmth either, and so don’t count on much in the empathy department.

Just a reminder — before we get to slog through the next couple of years with this crowd. After a few years of this kind of income the world looks much different from that of the rest of us.


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“The little campaign that could”

Yeah. That was it.




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Got the Upper Hand


Rather than make the effort to draft out a formal response to this sad election, we’ll just repeat a comment of ours from earlier this morning. No use working hard.


I wouldn’t call Frutos nutty. Just kind of a credulous stiff. A nothing.

Springer on the other hand is a ditz. A true dilettante who comes from the world of real estate and development. Bad news for Burbank.

But this new pack of tattooed Millennials and angry, subliterate menopausals who put her in there truly deserve what’s going to happen. None of them bring anything to the table, believe me, which is why they all belong in Burbank. The self-entitled moronic element here is worse than ever.

Yes, what’s left up there on the dais are all retirees who — at best — over their many years have obviously forgotten about what used to be called “the possibilities of life,” if they ever had a decent vision of things to begin with. Going eagerly into the bureaucracy as they did at a young age  — and into management positions no less — I doubt it.

That’s why Gordon alone was the only one on the council who was ever fucking CURIOUS enough about things in general to want to ask decent questions all the time. The others up there were — again at best — just completely bored about everything. And I’m being charitable about their motives.

There’s not a good idea in the bunch, and never has been. The real disappointment there is Will though. With his own personal work background he of all of them should know better. Maybe he never did.

It must be a long, sad fall from Andre Previn and the world at large. But fuck him now.




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It’ll get worse, too





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This is why you can just feel the social empathy and sensitivity dripping from their pores

(Click each to enlarge)





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You’re still paying him


The Keyboard Commando gets a pension for his part-time council years.



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